What are your goals with the car? Is this going to be a street car/something else(ie street car/drag car or street car/track car, etc.). Just a street car? $12,000 is alot of money to build your FD.
1. Any engine can handle 450hp, unless there are other issues. What seals are you refering to when you say iron seals?
2. I have some components in my engine bay ceramic coated. It def. helps, but heat shielding and other measures also help.
3. All depends on what ECU your tuner is most comfortable with. The most user friendly ECU and most widely used in my opinion is the Apexi Power FC. You can also buy a datalogit for it and log basically everything.
4. Depends on your goals. If it's going to be a street car, I'd get the BNR Stage 3's and leave them sequential. If you are wanting a drag car, a stupid big turbo is prob. the choice for you. A track car I'd recommend a single as well because it doesn't produce as much heat as the twins do.
5. Never run it lean, never overheat it, and never starve the inside of oil... sounds simple enough, right?